Alright so I just wrote this thing for English and am now seeking, like I said above, some serious critiquing. The assignment was to write a letter like the ones you read in all the Chicken Soup books...about overcoming an obstacle or learning some kind of life lesson. This is mine...
BEFORE YOU READ:
1) I value your opinions. Anything you say, I can handle I swear. Don't hold back. Go ahead and tell me what you did or did not like about it. You don't have to respond with the cookie-cutter "Oh, I liked that" answer. :)
2) By posting this - I AM not seeking pity points, sympathy, or anything like that so please - just keep that in mind!
So here we go:
Dear Chicken Soup,
My name is Josh Galassi and I am 100 years old. For about a week now - as a school assignment - I've been reading countless letters from the Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul Letters book. Some of the entries that teens have written in the book have sent shivers up my spine, while others have succeeded in making me smile.
Out of all the letters that I’ve read, there’s one that’s stuck with me, even as I write this letter now, called Never Count Me Out written by Dan Mulhausen. In it, Dan describes his struggle with a troubling disability and how he was able to overcome it against all odds. I guess the reason it has stuck with me so is because I was born with a disability myself called Cerebral Palsy.
From day one of my life, I knew something was different about my legs, but it never bothered me until much later in life. As a child in my elementary years, I’d go to school where I would participate in normal psychical activities with my fellow classmates. In gym, I’d run the same number of laps anyone else would; and during a game, I’d run from one end to the gymnasium and back…just like everyone else.
However, all this seemed to change when I entered middle school. Perhaps it was the awkward phase my body was going through or maybe it was just the transition to an entirely new school, but before I knew it, the way my legs moved was beginning to become my personal enemy. I’d walk down the crowded hallways and peer at those around me, noticing the way they walked and how I didn’t. When I was assigned to take gym, I would try to participate as little as possible, for with each passing day I’d dread it more and more.
Even those little middle school relationships started to get to me. At night I’d lay in bed and wonder if the reason why the girls didn’t like me was because the way I walked. It was then that the negative thoughts in my head began to increase while my confidence in myself did the opposite.
It wasn’t until high school, the place I’m at now, in which I realized self-pity was getting me no where. I took a long, hard look at myself and realized that my legs were made this way for a reason and that my life shouldn’t be wasted holding back on something just because it might be a little extra work.
As individuals, it is important that we always remain as comfortable with ourselves as we can, no matter how uncomfortable our obstacles or insecurities in life may make us feel. Even though I’m still in the process of achieving the level of comfort within myself, not a day has gone by since middle school when I don’t try.
I’m now in my second year of high school and have been enrolled in gym for a little over half of the year. I actually look forward to the class and give it my all whenever I’m in it. I’ve yet to find myself a girlfriend, but have found that I have my whole life ahead of me for that. My insecurities still get to me from time to time, but whenever they do – I simply tell myself one thing: that God gave me these legs for a reason, and I think He’d want me to use them. That usually does the trick.
Grammar is perfect and the message is divine. It can be applied to anyone, not just those with a disability. I think it is very well written and the ending is perfect and even inspiring.
Good job, let me know what you get on it!
Aww, thanks! Yeah, part of the assignment is to make it something everyone can relate to...so phew. Does this whole:
". I took a long, hard look at myself and realized that my legs were made this way for a reason and that my life shouldn’t be wasted holding back on something just because it might be a little extra work.
As individuals, it is important that we always remain as comfortable with ourselves as we can, no matter how uncomfortable our obstacles or insecurities in life may make us feel."
thing flow well?
Dude no cookie cutter "I think its great" answer just because I think its what you want to hear! I think this letter is very well written and its really good. I love that you explained what you went through in school and stuff, it made it even more personal, how it should be. I think this is awesome I wanna know what you get on it :)